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Sunday 27 February 2011

Day 10 - Discuss your first love and your first kiss












Jesus fucking christ, why don't you just come out and ask me to discuss my hotmail account secret password answers already?

The wording of the question makes me think that a first love and first kiss are shared with the same person, for me this isn't really true. Though I suppose it depends on what exactly is meant by first love and first kiss. First peck on the cheek or first time using tongues? First girl I loved as a child, or who I fell in love with as an adult? It's complicated, so I'm just going to answer the questions I want to.

When I was very young, I had a female friend. Her name wasn't Amber. But me and her would do everything together and our friendship lasted what must have been 7 years. I totally loved her. Then her family relocated to Australia. I remember the day before she left, she was giving her friends at school cards with her photo in and a message to say goodbye, but I didn't get one - I was upset, and then at the end of the day she found me and gave me a special card and message and a kiss on the cheek goodbye.

I cried the whole way home. I remember my dad holding me as I sobbed uncontrollably. I saw her once after that, about 3 years after she moved. Then never again. Later, when I studied Drama and I needed to act upset or cry, this is the memory I would think about.

My first kiss, as in my first proper full on mouth on mouth kiss was with a girl who wasn't called Jennifer. Me and my family used to stay with ex neighbours at their place in Somerset every other Christmas. It was actually brilliant. One particular year there was a big New Years, and other parents also brought their kids. One of them was Jennifer. We got along and went on random walks into the countryside, getting lost and lying in fields. I was awkward and completely lacking experience around girls but we kissed for hours. I remember awkwardly thanking her afterwards. Cringeworthy.

God, I used to be such a sweet boy. What happened?
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